Realities Unknowable

Robyn Chaffey

Hazelbrook, New South Wales

Australia

 

‘Some things in life’ they say, ‘are harder’.
They say too, ‘forgiveness is the way to go.’
It is true enough, yet this I do better know,
That there are times when life’s realities are broader!

There are realities unknowable
Like waking up to memories …
Unreachable, untenable realities;
Which from ones very being are inseparable!

Who are you to judge what I may feel?
You, who grew and lived by things I learned
Before you were a ‘twinkle’, and before I got burned!
You who say from me you got the raw deal …

Never knew realities unknowable!

How I looked forward to your adult years;
To the days when I could chat with you as equals,
Laugh about days gone by, and finally be pals …
Enjoy prizes won only by blood, sweat and tears …

Laugh at my realities unknowable!

Aye, some things are not so easy in this life.
Sometimes best efforts do not reward our hope.
Others dreams may send them slipping on a too steep slope.
Yet that should not ever be a cause for strife …

The sadness of realities unknowable!

What made you think I needed you to live for me …
That it was not in me to support you in your choices?
You still don’t see that my fight was for your voices …
I bonded me to you so that you could be set free!

The courage of realities unknowable!

Yes, to see you live stronger than I ever was enabled
Was my reason to keep going; what stopped me giving in!
That I wanted so much more for you! That was my sin!
I believed the cruel myth of mother joy that’s fabled!

There are realities unknowable
Like waking up to memories …
Unreachable, untenable realities;
Which from ones being are inseparable!

Bio: This poem was written in a pensive moment and is about those times when the rules we try to live by as individuals—as mothers—simply do not fit with the realities we need to deal with in life.